The Gospel, Discipleship and the Transformation of Our Desires (Part 3/3)
Author: Stef Miles
Jesus Reveals a Different Desire
The cross reveals not only what Jesus refuses to do. It reveals the kind of desire that animates his entire life. Jesus does not overcome violence through a greater act of violence. He does not defeat his enemies by becoming like them. Instead, he reveals a completely different source from which human beings can live: a desire rooted not in rivalry, scarcity or fear, but in the abundant love of the Father.
This is what makes Jesus more than simply a moral teacher offering us a better way to behave. Jesus reveals an entirely different way of being human.
He does not live from rivalry.
He never grasps for status.
He never seeks significance at another person’s expense.
He never responds to violence with violence.
His desire is rooted completely in the Father’s desire: a love that gives itself away freely and creates freedom for others. In fact, Jesus said: “The Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing.” (John 5:19) Jesus’ entire life is an imitation of the Father’s desire. He does not desire independently of the Father. His life is one of complete participation in the Father’s self-giving love.
And because the Father’s love is abundant rather than scarce, Jesus has no need to compete, dominate or prove himself. He lives from non-rivalrous fullness rather than lack. This is why Jesus can welcome outsiders, forgive enemies, touch the excluded and lay down his life for others.
Jesus breaks the cycle of mimetic rivalry not simply because he teaches us a new set of behaviours, but because he reveals a new desire to imitate. He shows us what it looks like to live from the very heart and desire of God: a desire not driven by rivalry, fear or scarcity, but by self-giving love.
Becoming Like Jesus
The early Church understood that discipleship was fundamentally about imitation. Paul, for example, writes: “Imitate me, as I imitate Christ.” (1 Corinthians 11:1) Paul understood something profoundly human: everyone is being formed by someone.
The question is never really whether we will imitate. It is whose desire we will allow to become our own. And for the follower of Jesus, the answer must be Christ.
Cornelis Bennema’s important recent work Imitation in Early Christianity demonstrates just how central imitation was within the early Christian tradition. Although Bennema does not write directly from a Girardian perspective, his conclusions resonate deeply with this vision. He argues that early Christian imitation was not about simply copying Jesus externally, but about a dynamic and transformative process through which believers became people whose lives reflected Christ.
He writes:
“For Christians the aim of imitating Jesus is not to become a clone but to express Jesus and his character in their lives.”
This, I think, gets very close to the heart of discipleship. The goal is not simply to behave like Jesus. The goal is to become people who desire like Jesus.
The Transformation of Desire
So how are our desires actually transformed? This question lies at the heart of why the Nonviolent Gospel Network exists. Transformation happens through formation.
Friend of the Network Gena St David, in her book Brain and the Spirit, explores the fascinating relationship between neuroscience, spiritual formation and human transformation. Drawing from neuroscience, attachment theory and spiritual theology, St David highlights the importance of trust and safety in shaping who we become. Our brains are constantly asking a fundamental question:
Am I safe?
When we experience threat, fear and insecurity, our brains move into protective patterns. We become more reactive, defensive and focused on survival. And I think this has profound implications for how we understand God.
If our image of God is shaped primarily by fear, punishment or insecurity, our desires can easily become caught in the very dynamics that shape the world around us: striving, competition, anxiety and the constant need to prove ourselves.
But when we experience genuine trust and safety, something different becomes possible. We become less governed by survival responses and more open to learning, connection and change. St David highlights that growth requires the right balance of safety and stress. Too little stress and we do not grow. Too much and we become overwhelmed and defensive. But when we experience enough safety, trust and connection, our brains become capable of forming new pathways and new patterns. Trust, she says, “regulates our nervous system”. And that has profound implications for discipleship.
The Father revealed by Jesus is not a God we need to appease or compete before. He is the utterly trustworthy God whose love is secure, abundant and freely given. As we learn to rest in that love, our desires can slowly begin to change.
Through prayer, contemplation, Scripture, community and the work of the Spirit, we are gradually freed from patterns of rivalry, fear and scarcity.
The gospel is not an invitation to try harder. It is an invitation to be transformed.
To desire what Jesus desires.
To love what Jesus loves.
To embody his way of life.
Every day, our desires are being shaped by someone or something. The invitation of discipleship is to allow our deepest desires to be formed by the One who reveals the Father’s non-rivalrous, self-giving love.
Which brings us back to the question we began with:
Whose desires are shaping us?